Every young lass dreams of what her wedding day will be like -- the flowing gowns, beautiful flowers adoring everything, the ancient chants of monks heralding a hero to save us from ancient evils threatening the world. This lucky bride got her wish with one of the most epic ballads to every grace Tamriel, the song The Dragonborn Comes, as performed by Malukah, from The Elderscrolls 5: Skyrim. Watch her and her groom's robotic glide across a dance floor while a bewildered audience stares.
How can I put this as elegantly as possible? Uh...not sure if want. Yes, that seems appropriately internet-speak for this blessed occasion. The world may never be privy to the decision process that led these two to settle on a video game song for their special day, but as long as they can refrain from naming their firstborn "Dohvahkin," then I think we can let them slide on this one.
Well, this weekend I went to see an off-Broadway show and a movie, but still found time to play some games... despite this stupid cold I just can't seem to shake. Nothing new, but there's stuff coming on the horizon... but do demos whet your appetite or spoil the game? Ah, the age-old dilemma...
Any awesome viral video worth its salt will warn dumb teenagers "Don't do this at home, you could die, stupid, and then you'd be, like, so mad." Finally, Capcom has broken the trend and begun to invite overzealous fans to emulate their favorite Street Fighter X Tekken fighters in a home video contest.
Aspiring dancers are encouraged to emulate moves from two quick clip movies put together for this contest, remixing a dance routine of moves from both Street Fighter and Tekken to show those judges just what a dancing martial artist looks like. The contest invites both individuals and troupes to work together for the best impersonations of their favorite fighters. Bonus points for extra hadokens, of course.
The best dance videos will be put together on a short list, which then gets sent to a group of Capcom representatives working with the One Motion dance crew to find the two king of fighters (see what I did there?) and pit them against each other live. The winner then gets their routine made into a professional movie for all the geeks on Youtube to swoon over for years to come!
Anyone looking to enter into the contest can send their entry to competition@capcom.com. And anyone looking for the Tekken move video can find it after the jump. For the rest of us, pretending to be professional martial artists means Youtube will soon be swarmed with hilarious videos of failed dragon punches and teenagers jumping off rooftops towards horribly shattered bones. Keep a weather eye, kids.
Just kidding, we of course don't want anyone doing anything that might get them hurt. Please don't be stupid and enter this contest with a video of your little brother jumping off the second story roof while doing his best high kick. The medical bills will outweigh the dinner table story for years to come.
The Middle Ages: They were simpler times, back when the "male hindquarters" equivalent of a high five was comedy fit for royalty. Yet as history tells us, every decent medieval comedy act was followed by a frost spell grenade, the destruction of a ship, and of course, the obligatory "assassination by decapitation" of said royalty.
Such is the crux of the Xbox 360 trailer for The Witcher 2. PC gamers have been exploring its splendor for some time, but for those like myself, owning what those in the business call "a glorified electric abacus, barely capable of running Qbasic," are left with only the 360 to whet our collective appetite for action, adventure, and polyamourous protagonists that are full of what the kids (no longer) call "baditude."
So for those hoping to follow the continuing adventures of Baron Von Sexy Geralt, but find your computer woefully inadequate, The Witcher 2 will be released on April 17th. In the meantime, be sure to check out the trailer! It's stylish, rather stunning, and most importantly, delivers an epicness of pants-wetting proportions.
Well, I was miserably sick last week. I mean, miserably. So I didn't do a lot of gaming. Sure, towards the end of the week, I got in a little Skyrim, and even almost killed myself trying to do a new Dance Central song. But for the most part, it was streaming cheesy movies on Netflix. And I discovered that the Xbox 360 Kinect voice controls are a thing of beauty when you're weak as a kitten!
Got a quick one for you today, gaymers. This delightful little video with some NSFW language comes to you courtesy of the Frag Dolls, outlining stuff you've probably heard on XBL, Ventrillo, or Battle.net. @alibakes is absolutely amazing with the pink mustache. Give it a look-see if you've got a few minutes to kill (and some headphones).
Internet, you are nothing if not quirky. After a caffeine-induced jaunt through the labyrinth of YouTube's "related videos" section, yours truly was met with a rather curious TF2-themed bit of multimedia weirdness, "The (not so) Pleasant Cycle of Thundermountain."
Utilizing the famed "Gary's Mod," the video is an offshoot of the "Vicious Cycle of X" meme. The videos feature frantic, offbeat weirdness - bearing all the hallmarks of something scraped together from crayon scribblings on the walls of a lunatic asylum - inspiring YouTube user "Sakuukuli" to buck the trend in a most subversive way. Casual viewers may be charmed by the juxtaposition of an otherwise-violent video game with the sweet, classical stylings of Georges Bizet's "Les Toreadores;" yet beneath the sheen of silliness, the above video paints a harrowing portrait of that irredeemable species of which we are all a part: humanity.
"The (not so) Pleasant Cycle of Thundermountain," presents us with a portrait of a brave, egalitarian age. With the scourge of Capital and it's trappings vanquished, mankind sought to forsake the law of the jungle and step, ever so tenuously, into the age of genuine civilization. The old ways of thinking (one might even go so far as to call it a "vicious cycle") of warfare, hatred, and social division would die, and in its place would be erected a new system of relations - one built on the principles of kindness, compassion, and the Universal Brotherhood of Man (just a poetic flourish, ladies). Internationalism would rule the roost, and a united humanity would step boldly, arm in arm, into a brighter future, Leaving behind material want, and vulgar lust for power, ours would forevermore be the epoch of peace, progress, and the pursuit of happiness not for a select few, but for all.
Yet in the end, our bestial origins prevailed, and like the savage apes from whence our humble species arose, we once again sought to destroy the reviled "other." Tribe against tribe, friend against friend, the Brotherhood of Man was torn asunder Indeed, the empty battlefields of TF2 are a tomb - not for a soldier, nor even an army, but for mankind's highest aspirations. Our species would died not in a blaze of glory, as the video may superficially suggest: Rather, our demise was the dull consequence of our pride, our callousness, and above all, our stupidity. One cannot help but dwell on the haunting words of T.S. Elliot:
"This is the way the world ends: Not with a bang but a whimper."
So enjoy the video, happy Friday, and may God have mercy on your souls.
Despite being of the atheistic bent, my love of all thing post-apocalyptic is constantly challenged by my love of things - well, apocalyptic. None of this "global warming bringing widespread famine" stuff mind you; I mean the full-bore "Four horseman galloping across a flame-scorched earth, emerging from plumes of sulfur belched from great chasms, while many-headed dragons circle overhead," biblical apocalypse. Thus, we have Darksiders 2.
I haven't had a chance to play the original Darksiders - the most common description I've found is that it is a sort of God of War-influenced hack & slash game, with some bits reminiscent of the Zelda series thrown in - and while it's not quite the "swarms of locusts devouring the Earth" End Times I would hope for (at least judging from the videos I've seen), the subject matter and aesthetic looked potentially interesting.
This time around, you assume the role of Death - specifically, its beefy incarnation. As one might expect, Death prefers his conventional method of conflict resolution over the less popular "hug attack," in the pursuit of his mission. The trailer gives brief overview of the character, his impact on humanity, and his many forms. While I'm a bit wary of story elements in action-heavy games - though it is worth noting that the developers have previously indicated that Darksiders 2 will have more RPG elements than its predecessor - the subject matter is interesting enough that, given the inclination and talent, the folks over at THQ could come up with something to satisfy those of us that crave all things Armageddon.
Have you played the original Darksiders? Do you have any thoughts or predictions about its sequel? Sound off in the comments section below!
video via Joystiq
Hey, guess what! I played something other than Skyrim this week! You'll have to watch to find out what, though. And I muse about which kind of DLC I prefer and why, as well as offer you a recommendation of a book to check out and a movie to avoid! What more could you ask for?
Nothing says "post-apocalyptic fun and frolic," quite like a mournful rendition of "Home on the Range," set to the terror which man hath brought upon himself.
Come February 7th (February 10th for Europe), the "Ultimate Edition" of New Vegas shall arrive, bringing with it, as everyone's marketing department would undoubtedly say, "Ultimate Savings." For $50, you get the original game, and every DLC pack - Dead Money, Honest Hearts, Old World Blues, and Lonesome Road - as well as the add-ons "Courier's Stash" and "Gun Runners' Arsenal."
So if you, like me, have yet to enjoy the irradiated loveliness that is New Vegas, this is your opportunity to become an elderly shut-in surrounded by throngs of cats see what all the fuss was about. 2012, you held such promise. D*mn you Obsidian Entertainment, and d*mn you Bethesda - a pox on all your houses.
Capcom announced today that they are developing Resident Evil 6. In other news, bears crap in the woods, water is wet, and the Pope is Catholic.
As you can see in the lovely-looking trailer above, Leon S. Kennedy is chums with the president, who apparently wants to reveal the truth behind the decade-old Raccoon City incident in the hopes of curbing bioterrorism. But when bioterrorists attack the venue (as they do), Leon must face off against a president... transformed. Meanwhile, Chris Redfield heads to a China under bioterrorist attack (they're really busy) and it seems the entire world is under siege. And I'm probably not alone here hoping for some bromantic moments when Chris and Leon... "team up" to defeat the threat.
"Resident Evil 6 represents a giant stride forward in the evolution of the series," commented Katsuhiko Ichii, Head of R&D and Global Marketing. "The development team, led by Hiroyuki Kobayashi, is working tirelessly to deliver the most impressive Resident Evil® title ever both in terms of scope and production values. We are all genuinely excited by the title and cannot wait to share it with the world."
Hiroyuki Kobayashi, Resident Evil 6 Executive Producer added: "From the outset the team's intention was to create an experience that delivers a gripping storyline, tense single-player and co-op action all set against a constant theme of horror. We are calling this fusion dramatic horror and are confident it will resonate with both existing fans of the series as well as newcomers."
Resident Evil 6 is slated to release on the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 on November 20, with a PC version to follow. And if you're really super-eager, they've also started their pre-order campaign at GameStop, Best Buy and Amazon.com, with each retailer offering an exclusive map that will function with various modes in the game. Further information about the maps and modes will be coming later on down the road, so I would think it'd be best to hang on and see what's what. I mean, who pre-orders a game 10 months before its release anyway?
Indeed, nothing says "fighting game trailer" quite like hand-to-hand combat, sudden camera cuts, and gut-busting, 80's style guitar madness. In this case, said trailer is for Street Fighter X Tekken, a crossover title that features the lovely Street Fighter 4 art style. For the most part, it's pretty self-explanatory: You choose your favorite Street Fighter(Chun Li) or Tekken(don't care, on account of no Chun-Li) character, wailing your opponent into bloodless submission before a captive audience. The most surprising thing is reserved for the Vita version (currently in development), which as 1UP notes, features "Cole from Infamous, plus Toro and Kuro." However, right around 3:10, one can spy the sillhouette of not only Mega Man, but our chompy, yellow friend: Pac Man.
While better known as the punisher of the damned, Pac Man's signature move has usually involved devouring one's incorporeal essence, sending the fragments back to the black nothingness from whence it came, and repeating the cycle for all eternity - or at least, until the player turns off his or her console. Chances are Street Fighter X Tekken will be devoid of such existential horrors - favoring instead the use of Pac Man's mighty fists - but one can always dream.
Street Fighter X Tekken is set for release March 6th, on Xbox 360 and PS3. The Vita version is currently without a release date.
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